Happiness is a learned skill. It isn’t easy and there is no crash course. And, yet, I meet people all the time–family, friends and neighbors who believe that if they are thinner, smarter, better looking, wealthier, married, divorced, more approved of, less approved of, they will be happy. The problem with this thinking is that you assume you are powerless and those around you have the power to make you happy. In short, you are allowing others to determine whether or not you are happy. If you want to learn to be happy you must realize that it is ONLY YOUR ACCEPTANCE OF YOURSELF that can create your happiness, make you feel uplifted, empowered, fed, fueled, loved and wanted and THAT is an inside job. The stuff that comes from the outside is TEMPORARILY making you happy at best. Just think of the last concert you enjoyed, book you read, play you saw, friend you visited. Recall how happy you were at the time and then how quickly that feeling faded. What we bring into us is short-lived but what is inside can expand and breathe life into us all of the time. TRY THIS. Think of a wonderful memory. Visualize it and breathe as you see it. Keep breathing naturally and slowly and go even deeper into the image. Let the image expand inside of you and fill you up. Keep doing this on and off throughout your day as you feel stressed or down. Learn to go INSIDE YOURSELF for relief, love, peace and calm. IF there is nothing there, learn how to befriend yourself and happiness is all yours.
If you found this helpful and would like to learn how to do this, please don’t hesitate to e.mail me at nanlcsw@gmail.com or call me at 847.491.1111. Feel free to offer my article to others. I do this as a free service to promote relational healing.