Relationship management is no different than stress management except that you focus on THE LEVEL OF STRESS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP rather than within yourself.
Relationship Management or awareness is a must if you are going to maintain an on-going bond of love and emotional honesty between you and your partner. To keep your love flowing, become aware of your conversations, level of frustration, level of affection and acceptance or lack thereof. Ask yourself how much energy you are putting into the relationship right now. If you or your partner are constantly stressed, check-in with each other and talk about it. If that doesn’t feel safe or productive, there is probably a high level of undetected stress between you. But never fear, couples counseling is here.
Couples counseling can provide you with tools to help you talk to your partner without attacking him/her or getting defensive. The therapist does not take sides but, instead, helps you both understand your partner’s view. Frequently, partners put their long-held assumptions and beliefs on the table and each is shocked at what is revealed.
Perhaps, a woman reveals in couples counseling that she has been angry at her husband for choosing his internet and kindle over her. When her husband hears this, he reveals that he has felt abandoned all of these years by her so he has resorted to his gadgets to distract from feeling neglected. Once the couple share this information, they can become more empathic to their partner and move out of anger and back into connection. Now the relationship can grow and each partner can become more understanding of the impact he or she has on their partner. This is the gateway to healthy communication and intimacy.
If you found this helpful, feel free to contact me at nanlcsw@gmail.com or call me at 847.491.1111. Don’t hesitate to offer my article to others. I do this as a free service to promote relational healing.